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I would like to make new friends for general conversation only

I have recently moved to a new home, and I feel very isolated where I am living not knowing many people here. I would very much like to make and chat with some new friends.  Is there anyone else in the same situation?


Created By on 18/08/2015

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Fiftiesgirl
1st Feb 2017 18:00:50 (Last activity: 1st Feb 2017 20:48:48)
-1
Thanks for voting!
I moved from my hometown in 2002, the reason I moved was to be close to my son and his family. My sister also lives close by. This town is larger, but not too big. I've worked for the school system for 13 years and am now retired. I still haven't found many people who seem to be interested in forming friendships, would like to discuss this. I'm sort of shy, and it takes awhile for me to warm up to people. I'm always trying to figure out if I can joke around and be myself, or will people take it the wrong way. I've always felt more comfortable around younger people. I need help finding just everyday people that don't take themselves too seriously.
Response from ecarg made on 1st Feb 2017 20:48:48
Hi Fiftiesgirl I'm one of those myself .I.m a believer in being yourself far to difficult to maintain some false persona.We need more people on the site with a sense of humour. There are lots of topics that you can join in with your opinions and hopefully generate some chat.
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Sandyn
1st Jan 2017 20:54:26 (Last activity: 1st Jan 2017 23:49:21)
0
Thanks for voting!
I do believe I have ended up across the globe. I am in the States. Anyone for a chat?
Response from VeeJay89 made on 1st Jan 2017 23:49:21
Hi Sandyn-just joined today, happy to chat, time differences allowing! Daughter and b/f currently in the US so feel I have a connection!
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poodlelover
31st Dec 2016 16:46:14 (Last activity: 1st Jan 2017 13:10:50)
0
Thanks for voting!
I live in South Wales but would like to chat to others in any part of the country. I am outgoing and friendly. I live a busy life although I do enjoy surfing the net as well as interacting with people face-to-face.
Response from poodlelover made on 1st Jan 2017 13:10:50
Will do, LittleMinx. Just finding my way around at the moment. Thanks.
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ChrisinTD
2nd Dec 2016 07:55:29 (Last activity: 31st Dec 2016 16:57:53)
3
Thanks for voting!
I retired early, and quickly had to get jobs in order to have human interaction! I also recently started volunteering at a Community Centre, and ended up being asked to be a trustee. Loneliness comes from hiding. People our age should learn from the confidence of our young people. Get out there! (I know it's sometimes not that simple!)
Response from Georgie Girl made on 14th Dec 2016 19:09:07
Loneliness to my mind can stem from many factors, it is too easy to presume people can 'get out there' although I am sure you meant it with good intentions.
Response from poodlelover made on 31st Dec 2016 16:57:53
Hi Chris. I took early retirement too but soon found plenty to occupy myself. I do voluntary work although I know it's not for everybody but it keeps my mind active! I also enjoy mixing with younger people. It is a level playing field when you have shared interests. Age is not a factor then although I have found I have now become 'invisible' to some people eg shop assistants. I live on my own but I have dogs so I can talk to them and they always agree with me so I am never really alone. I am also lucky that I drive and can visit my family and friends whenever I want. I do feel for people who are shy, lacking in confidence and therefore often lonely. I wish I had a magic wand to help them but no one can change things but oneself. Easier said than done though as Georgie Girl points out. I was very insecure when I was a young woman despite all the trappings of a happy life. Not sure when things changed for me but I'm so glad they did. I do hope that coming on this forum will help the lonely find new friends. I certainly want to.
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Georgie Girl
27th Dec 2016 15:33:39
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi flyingdreams, welcome.

Loner, welcome, hope today is a happy one for you both.
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flyingdreams
27th Dec 2016 11:36:33
1
Thanks for voting!
Hi local people I live in Canterbury and am looking to find social chat friends. I'm 74, Ex Navy and Ex lorry driver. My married life was in Ashford and am looking to move back there soon as my Son and his family live there. I am widowed.
This is a bit like fishing with no bait, who knows what you'll get.! This is an update on the last post I made .
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loner
26th Dec 2016 21:48:10 (Last activity: 27th Dec 2016 09:55:54)
0
Thanks for voting!
lonely smoker dont see anyone for days & days suffers depression so no confidence & doesnt go out
Response from flyingdreams made on 27th Dec 2016 09:55:54
Hi Loner- Don't let your 'smokes' be your only friend - get out ! Help others with doing anything to get yourself occupied, be a friend / companion to others alone. If you look you will find,
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ILM1970
12th Dec 2016 05:24:36
0
Thanks for voting!
I am in the same situation. I know your post is from last year and I really hope you are doing much better now and enjoying the company of new friends. Let me know if you can share some tips to go through this in a better way.
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ann_mcpherson
6th Nov 2016 16:54:06 (Last activity: 6th Nov 2016 20:15:15)
1
Thanks for voting!
HI everyone, just joined, I'm 56 and live on my own. Just looking for friendship and people to chat to.
Response from Georgie Girl made on 6th Nov 2016 18:23:24
Hello Ann, new here myself, welcome.
Response from ecarg made on 6th Nov 2016 20:15:15
Hi Ann
Welcome I hope you find some of the forum topics interesting.I'm guessing you may be Scottish .There are a few McPherson's in my area.
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deniseburke
3rd Nov 2016 12:58:45 (Last activity: 3rd Nov 2016 15:07:23)
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi

I have just joined and am willing to chat to anyone. Although I am of a certain age I am still working hard. I did retire when I was 55 but couldn't stand the time! I also live alone but I never feel lonely I think that is a state of mind as well as having too much time to dwell.
Response from jeanymay made on 3rd Nov 2016 14:08:14
Welcome Denise I hope you enjoy the site
Response from ecarg made on 3rd Nov 2016 15:07:23
Hi
I hope you find the comments regarding retirement and loneliness thought prevoking ,I think loneliness may be more than a state of mind, it's about actually having a person around to talk to and going days at a time without speaking to somebody. Having time to dwell I agree can become depressive but encouragement to use our time wisely be that helping others or pleasing ourselves has been the response from chats exchanged here and I hope like me you find them informative and beneficial.
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RosemaryJane
1st Oct 2016 16:31:36 (Last activity: 31st Oct 2016 08:06:08)
0
Thanks for voting!
I'm interested in chatting to anyone who is fairly newly retired-particularly keen to find out how they fill their time.
I've joined my local U3A and also have coffee and walks with a couple of close friends but, having retired Autumn 2015, I found the months of January and February difficult to cope with. I seemed to "waste" a lot of time on wet, dark days.
And I want to avoid this in the future.
However, apart from volunteering (which I'm not keen to commit to yet) I need advice on how to get a "structure" to my days. Ways for more self discipline too would be useful.

I'd love advice/tips/chat with anyone who relates to my situation.
Response from ednalee3101 made on 29th Oct 2016 23:28:06
Hi, I actually retired 5 years ago now (at the end of October). When I retired a colleague told me not to rush into doing anything, but to take 6 months before deciding what to do. One of the things I did fairly quickly was to join a quick fit class for the over 50s. The following June I started some volunteering. I do some volunteer driving, which means taking people to appointments, shopping or visiting friends. I didn't feel that I wanted to volunteer in charity shops.
Response from ecarg made on 30th Oct 2016 01:14:08
Hi Rosemary Jane I retired 18months ago and like you found Jan and Feb a drag. I've tried different hobbies art classes , knitting , sewing and currently quilling I also like to read but days just drifted by. When I retired I was told to find a reason to get out of the house everyday I haven't achieved this yet but I do volunteer at a community kitchen and pick my granddaughter up from school once a week and shopping .I really think losing the structure of going to work and keeping house is hard to deal with after retirement. At the moment I still feel I have useful days and completely useless days where I watch to much TV and spend to much time on the laptop . I think it's about being self motivated but I'm sorry I can't give you any tips as I need a few myself , but I try not to beat myself up and go with the flow .I know you don.t want to commit to volunteering yet but there are loads of volunteering jobs and they do provide a sense of purpose again,
Response from Georgie Girl made on 30th Oct 2016 12:16:15
Many of us talk about volunteering when retired, joining keep fit etc., I have done this now I have too many aches and pains to even walk some days, this is the time you really find the genuine people in life and so far apart from my husband and son there has not been anyone.
Response from ecarg made on 30th Oct 2016 12:51:21
I'm sorry Georgie Girl that your lack of mobility has left you feeling isolated.I don't know where you live but they may be day centres who provide transport so you could attend. You may say you don't want to be involved in anything official and I would have been the same but having worked at one as a work placement I was surprised about the amount of activites they provided as well as the social aspect, but until you reach out how will anyone know you are there .You will know where to find out what's available in your area I expect.Here our library is a good resource of community information.
Response from Georgie Girl made on 30th Oct 2016 18:36:29
Thanks ecarg, think I have given the wrong impression about my mobility, I am fine, it is only now and again my aches (like most of my generation) make me feel fed up and for the last year my feet are often really painful, don't know why but I still go walk. I am a go-getter always thinking of things to change/enhance my life and those of others but I have found on the days when people are not too good, friendship disappears.
Response from ecarg made on 30th Oct 2016 21:10:28
Glad to hear you sounding more upbeat I felt rather sad for you before. I have just received a great private post telling me I deserve to do what I want now that I am retired and I agree .So no more feeling guilty about not always being busy ,I am going to relax into retirement and find a mixture of activities that suits me and try to make some new friends to share some time with.
Response from jeanymay made on 31st Oct 2016 08:06:08
Good for you ecarg you have earned the right to please yourself. I hope you find some things that bring you pleasure. It is difficult filling the days especially for those of us who are alone now.
Good luck.
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ciedel
6th Apr 2016 11:55:39 (Last activity: 29th Oct 2016 23:36:39)
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi, recently joined. I moved on retirement to live in Germany. I'm looking for friends to have a chat with.
Response from ednalee3101 made on 29th Oct 2016 23:36:39
Hi Ciedel. Whereabout in Germany do you live? I went to school in Cologne but have now been in England for over 40 years.
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June V.
24th Sep 2016 19:06:20 (Last activity: 29th Oct 2016 23:32:04)
0
Thanks for voting!
Hello there....I am not going to be much use because I am just about to move from France (Courtesy of Brexit and after 11 1/2 very happy yrs here.Very sad, miserable as I don't want to go!) back to UK & I will be in the same isolated state as yourself !!!!
By then( it will be about December when we go) you will be able to give me some tips on how to overcome it/make friends / etc; I'm going to Norfolk, are you anywhere near there ?
Keep your chin up, things will get better.
Please forgive me if I don't get straight back to you but this house packing is filling my time & wearing me out !!!!
Best wishes, Sally J.V.
Response from ednalee3101 made on 29th Oct 2016 23:32:04
Good luck June V. I hope the move will go well and you settle in your new home in Norfolk
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flyingdreams
27th Jan 2016 20:36:25 (Last activity: 22nd Oct 2016 10:49:10)
3
Thanks for voting!
Hi local people I live in Canterbury and am looking to find social chat friends. I'm 74, Ex Navy and Ex lorry driver. My married life was in Ashford and am looking to move back there soon as my Son and his family live there. I am widowed.
This is a bit like fishing with no bait, who knows what you'll get.!
Response from kattie75 made on 7th Mar 2016 05:36:46
Flying dreams yes that's a good name I've recently signed on here looking for friends and someone to chat to I became a widow last year and I'm only just getting on my feet and looking around to see what can be done to fill the hours in the day and sometimes in the wee small hours when you wake up and there is nothing to do but read books I like that but it's nice to know someone else is the in the same boat and can chat
As you see I can chat about most things so if you want to unburden your "soul " I'm a good listener too
Kate
Response from Cessie made on 19th Aug 2016 09:01:10
Hello flyingdreams
How are things going for you now have you moved back to Ashford yet . I have had a short break from chatting but am back now so if you are still a member please drop me a line.
Response from annia65 made on 4th Oct 2016 16:39:18
Hi, I am 75, was widowed 6 months ago. We had been married for 35 years, like most marriages up & down. I don't know if I'm lonely or
bewildered, I'm not sure what to do next. I have had a couple of holidays, a cruise which I returned from on Sunday. I live near the sea in Hampshire, very pretty area. I have sons who,live overseas, adult grandchildren Aldo
overseas. We spent 30+ years in Southern Africa. I'm not lonely, but am solitary, I belong to U3A, swim, & generally get out & about. I have three
dear naughty little dogs.
Response from Vantodder made on 22nd Oct 2016 10:49:10
Hello Annia, I am 78 and also lived in Southern Africa for many years, until four years ago often went on holiday to Fish Hoek or Port Alfred. Now 24/7 carer for my wife who has parkinsons and COPD. Miss the African life style very much and would still be there but returned in response to pressure for family, not that we see much of them still parkinsons struck.
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Thymeheals
17th Oct 2016 18:49:03
2
Thanks for voting!
Hi I have just joined today, I too am looking for friendly chats.
I am recently a Widow, my husband of 21 years having died suddenly
last Oct. I live in rural Devon running my own Home Care and Therapy practice. My interests are History, Walking my lovely dog Hamish, watching movies especially historical fantasy and sci-fi, studying, I am an avid reader, my favourite author being Barbara Erskine, Knitting, the countryside, and having coffee and good conversation.
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Georgie Girl
16th Oct 2016 15:54:20 (Last activity: 17th Oct 2016 11:55:31)
0
Thanks for voting!
Just saying hi to anyone who may be surfing at the moment, I notice there are a couple of mentions of the U3A. When we moved to our area 3 years ago, we thought now is the time to join a U3A (University of the Third Age) nothing really do do with Universities now though, basically just a group of retired/semi retired people getting together, monthly meeting usually/hopefully with a decent speaker, join or create interest groups. However, we were surprised to discover there were waiting lists, we tried another in the area, once again a waiting list. We left this for 6 months and no-one whatsoever got in touch. This can't be right, waiting lists at our age, not a good idea. I took the initiative to contact U3A National Office and after 3 or 4 emails, I finally had a result, someone from Regional Office came to visit and I explained if there are two U3A's in our area with waiting lists, there was obviously need for new one. With the help of my husband we worked hard to pursue this: we leaflet dropped for 3 months, sat in the local library giving out info, sourced premises and much much more, we arranged a launch date and we had over 70 people turn up! To actually start the new group we needed to form a committee, during the meeting, I asked around and managed to get a few people to stay back, I agreed to be membership secretary and my husband treasurer. Some months later for various reasons we decided to leave the committee, but the group is now in its 3rd year and there are over 140 members. I feel very proud of the fact I have enhanced the life of so many, but isn't it strange, I do not feel I have made a single friend from this, unfortunately it has only made me lose faith in human nature somewhat...bitter sweet story. I am looking forward to meeting/chatting with others.
Response from Wilf made on 16th Oct 2016 16:51:34
I think U3A is great my mum belongs to one and she is 85. I am early 60s but not sure if I am a bit too young for them?
Response from KEITH_WL made on 17th Oct 2016 11:55:31
Well Georgie Girl I read your message and sent you a (polite) response but have received no reply from you. Perhaps we should ask why. Messages usually seem to be delivered. It might be a question of time-scale - some people are logged in less frequently than a retired person such as myself. However, yes, I'm afraid that some people are not communicators and do not reply.

Keith
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Jonzo
11th Oct 2016 09:31:50
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi Moodyblue (great band by the way) I nearly moved home myself after recently retiring but felt two big changes in one go was not a great idea. Be happy to chat. At moment I'm trying to do things I had always put off. In a shameless bit of self promotion here's a link to my fledgling blog https://johnretired.blogspot.co.uk/ which I know isn't great but it's been useful in terms of getting back into writing. I'd welcome any comments as the idea behind it was to open up discussion about experiences and feelings people had around retirement.

Have you got a U3A where you are? I've just joined where I am and they seem to have lots of good activities on offer.

John
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tyrasnan
10th Oct 2016 16:18:40
0
Thanks for voting!
i moved from the midlands up to lancashire 2 yrs ago, i find the people here are very friendly but sadly cannot comunicate with my old friends in warwick shire as theyare also in their 80,s and do not use a computer, Would be happy to communicate with anyone especially in theRugby or Coventry areas
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annia65
4th Oct 2016 16:30:24
0
Thanks for voting!
Hi, I know how you feel, I moved here a year ago, my husband passed away 11 months later. I wanted to move to Yorkshire ,
both he & my son vetoed it.
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JAYC
27th Mar 2016 19:58:50 (Last activity: 24th Sep 2016 15:13:49)
1
Thanks for voting!
just joined, was looking on the net and found this site, however it seems everyone is in UK . I am in Canada so maybe someone would like to talk to me
Response from bobo5000 made on 27th Mar 2016 20:33:18
This is new to me I just joined and I'm from Canada too. I am 63 years old ,retired female love to excercise watch tv and chat with my ill mother. My son visits me every Sunday with my grandchildren otherwise it's pretty lonely most of my friends do their own thing we chat sometimes but don't have much to say since retiring that's life so I've been told.
Response from kattie75 made on 28th Mar 2016 07:16:09
I'm always looking for people to chat too I live in England but I do have a couple of people I chat to in Canada so if you are interested I like gardening walking reading and writing emailing knitting and sewing by hand
Response from Steff made on 30th Mar 2016 00:26:33
Hi, I live in England, would love to chat to people. I am interested in gardening, just taken knitting up again (after several years of not knitting) - hand sewing, walking with my dog, through countryside, and just hearing about other peoples hobbys
Response from rubysgran made on 30th May 2016 15:26:24
hi jayc,im a widow living in the north east of england at the c oast,wonderful place to live,lovely friendly people though som etimes the weather can be awful
l have 2 daughters and 2 grandchildren and 2 cats who own me.
l love reading,gardening,cross stitch and having lunch with my friends

rubysgran
Response from emmakitty made on 13th Aug 2016 23:45:25
Hi Jayc,
I live not to far from you. Im always looking to chat. lisa
Response from Cora made on 24th Sep 2016 15:13:49
Hi i dont mind chatting to you 🙂 new to this today so havent a clue what im doing yet lol hope you get this anyway
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