Count down to Christmas!

Count down to Christmas!

Christmas is coming – and I’m already fat!
When did that happen? Can someone tell me that?
I guess it’s all the tension, the worry and the stress,
I think I’ve let things slip a bit – I look a sorry mess,

It must be all the sitting, I’m not active anymore,
I just pretend there’s no-one home if a knock comes on my door,
I much prefer to watch T.V.- it’s part of my routine,
A daily workout’s not for me, it’s really not my scene,

When did I get so chubby?  I can’t recall at all,
I’d have a brilliant B.M.I. if I was eight feet tall,
Perhaps I’m walking in my sleep? It’s possible, I think,
I’ll have to lock the ‘fridge at night and hide the food and drink,

So, if I’m counting down to Christmas, I had better make some haste,
Or I’m gonna need some baggy shirts and elasticated waists,
For I can’t resist a Selection Box or ever be denied,
Mince pies, Mulled wine and chocolates all over the Yuletide,

But when we raise a glass New Year, and listen for Big Ben,
I promise to go on a diet – and be a good girl then!