All mixed up, where to start
Watch this postHello everyone. I'm new here and have joined because I'm totally lost, and I'm thinking someone else feels like this maybe? I'm thinking about retirement (I'm 63). I had a wonderful life, travelling the world, until I got married. I unwittingly married into a family with serious mental health problems. After 30 plus years, the main source of a life of pure stress, is fading. I'm stuck working at home with my husband, who has mental health problems. I'd love to get out but I'm just so tired at the end of the day. He is a good, kind man, but very challenging. I long ago forgot who I am, what I want etc. How do you a) find a life again and b) drag yourself out to something when you really don't feel like it? I've looked at al the clubs etc around here, and have tried a few but would love to have a bit of fun or a laugh now and then.
Log in to comment
You need to be logged in to interact with Silversurfers. Please use the button below if you already have an account.
LoginNot a member?
You need to be a member to interact with Silversurfers. Joining is free and simple to do. Click the button below to join today!
JoinCommunity Terms & Conditions
Content standards
These content standards apply to any and all material which you contribute to our site (contributions), and to any interactive services associated with it.
You must comply with the spirit of the following standards as well as the letter. The standards apply to each part of any contribution as well as to its whole.
Contributions must:
be accurate (where they state facts); be genuinely held (where they state opinions); and comply with applicable law in the UK and in any country from which they are posted.
Contributions must not:
contain any material which is defamatory of any person; or contain any material which is obscene, offensive, hateful or inflammatory; or promote sexually explicit material; or promote violence; promote discrimination based on race, sex, religion, nationality, disability, sexual orientation or age; or infringe any copyright, database right or trade mark of any other person; or be likely to deceive any person; or be made in breach of any legal duty owed to a third party, such as a contractual duty or a duty of confidence; or promote any illegal activity; or be threatening, abuse or invade another’s privacy, or cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety; or be likely to harass, upset, embarrass, alarm or annoy any other person; or be used to impersonate any person, or to misrepresent your identity or affiliation with any person; or give the impression that they emanate from us, if this is not the case; or advocate, promote or assist any unlawful act such as (by way of example only) copyright infringement or computer misuse.
Nurturing a safe environment
Our Silversurfers community is designed to foster friendships, based on trust, honesty, integrity and loyalty and is underpinned by these values.
We don't tolerate swearing, and reserve the right to remove any posts which we feel may offend others... let's keep it friendly!
The first thing i thought off when i started to read your message was how brave of you to have carried on with your marriage when many others would have given up years ago, so i applaud you for sticking with your husband even in trying circumstances.
The first thing you need to do is learn to love yourself, this is not a selfish act but you need to think of yourself because you have a right to a life as much as anyone else.
There are charities like "Mind " who can give you information on people who suffer from mental health problems, these should be your first port of call or you GP, you need as much support as you can get so you can start to rebuild your life. You are not alone and many people are in situations like your own so reach out and seek help where ever you can.
All the best
Malcolm