This very amusing poem is written by Marie Hindmarsh and it is her humourous take on the ageing process:
Have you noticed as you get older that things have been re-arranged?
Many things I remember well now have sadly changed!
Every road is twice as long and they’ve added a hill or two.
It takes me longer to walk somewhere than it ever used to do.
And I’m sure the steps are so much deeper,
my knees won’t bend I’ve become a creeper.
I set off at a steady pace to catch the bus on time,
but it seems the bus has left too early when the service was once sublime.
I’ve given up reading the paper the print’s smaller than it used to be.
Even when I’m squinting, the words are hard to see.
The optician says “Cover up one eye and read from A to Zee” but for me it’s very difficult I only manage to get to G!
There’s no point asking someone to speak up loud when they talk in a very quiet voice.
I’m buggered if I’m getting a hearing aid, but maybe I have no choice!
Even my hair is not the same it was once my pride and joy.
Now I have to colour it if I want to find a toy boy.
My daughter says “Mum don’t worry, your moustache is the same shade of grey!
I tell her “Oh thank you darling, you’ve really made my day”!
So I’m off to get a lady shave that should do the trick,
but do I also need shaving foam that’s perfumed white and thick?
Why do I get these rogue course hairs that sprout out of my chin,
while the hair on my head is changing, and certainly starting to thin.
Then there are the age spots that appear it seems overnight,
some of them are a shade of brown while the others are a greyish white.
And of course there are the wrinkles and my ugly turkey neck.
I’ve spent so much money on night creams, but now think what the heck!
I won’t be taking any more selfies I don’t like what I see.
When I look at my image I think to myself, Oh God is that really me!
It seems that old age catches up on us all and it’s true I have to say.
After all those years of living well, now it’s time to pay.
Isn’t nature wonderful though how it makes the body change,
but does anyone know of a youth pill that for me you could arrange?
Written by Marie Hindmarsh 26/5/ 2014
