No thanks … I’m with my sister!

This  amusing poem is based on a true story, written by Martin Silvester, about how he got his first girlfriend  … 

No thanks … I’m with my sister!

How can I get a girlfriend dad?..I think I’d really like one!
Startled by the question, Dad just smiled and then said..son,
If your sure you want a girlfriend, then you’ll need to change your act,
Put away the games you play, learn diplomacy and tact.

Shower more than once a week, use a comb and clean your shoes,
Don’t spend your cash, on cigarettes, or beer belly booze.
Change your socks and underwear, every single day,
Try using a deodorant… try listening to what we say.

Blimey that’s a lot to ask, my mind was in a whirl,
That’s a lot of do’s and don’ts I thought, just to get a girl.
Oh and there’s something else you ought to do, he gave me a fiendish glance,
If you really want a girlfriend, then you’ll have to learn to dance.

Whoa..I thought, now steady on, this is getting out of hand,
Learning to dance, was not at all, something I had planned.
Then mum joined in and said to me..what your father said is true,
If you can dance, you won’t have to search..the girls will come to you.

So I did my best, took their advice, although it seemed a bore,
I even picked my clothes up, didn’t leave them on the floor.
Now for the really tricky bit, to learn to dance, my goal,
After trying different dances, I plumped for rock and roll.

I found that I enjoyed it, loved the songs and loved the beat,
And as I took the lessons, I developed dancing feet.
Now would come the testing time, the local hop was soon,
Would I meet a Sandra, or a Lynda, or a June.

So all spruced up, off I went, the hall was not too far,
When I walked in I found my mates, all lined up at the bar.
The girls were sitting in a row, down one side of the hall,
Their feet were tapping on the floor, but no one danced at all.

I hope mum and dad were right, I thought, as I walked towards the girls,
And I homed in, held out my hand, to a blonde with pretty curls.
Would you like to dance I stuttered, in my mind I’d already kissed her,
She just looked at me and answered thus, no thanks, I’m with my sister.

But I persevered, and moved down the row, resisting the urge to flee,
It would be a long way back across the floor, with my mates all watching me.
My mouth dried up as my courage failed, I was starting to despair,
But was saved by a YES..from a girl on the end, who smiled as she rose from her chair.

So I rocked and I rolled and the band played on, as I danced the night away,
And my mates just stood at the bar all night, ask a girl to dance…NO WAY!
I danced with every single girl, even the one with her sister,
But I wasn’t too sad when the band packed up, as one foot had developed a blister.

Thank you mum and thank you dad, for the advice you gave to me,
I’m glad to say, that you were right, about how I ought to be.
And learning to dance got me a girlfriend, I just could not resist her,
It wasn’t the one with the pretty curls, it was actually…her sister!

Written by:  Martin Silvester