Man Ban

Man Ban

It seems there now is a strange ban,
which stops us using the word man.
A man hole covers name is banned,
across all of this pleasant land.

We now must say it is for persons.
I really can’t think of a worse one.
A person hole is far from nice,
It strikes of things loaded with vice.

That common phrase “man on the street”
we’ve always used, it’s rather neat.
But person rears it’s ugly head,
and “average person” must be said

If someone asks you to man the desk,
be careful it may be a test.
now it is only done by “staff”.
I think someone must like a laugh.

And nothing now is made by man.
It seems it’s part of this sad ban.
we now must say it’s artificial.
It all seems just so superficial.

We do not say waitress and waiters,
It had to come sooner or later.
Now they are simply called a server,
(this is bound to cause a fervour).

And never call a fireman out.
Firefighters is the word about.
Please try not to be workman like,
or everyone will go on strike.

A chairman used to be the one,
to lead the team, now that is gone.
Now you must only please say chair,
to try and make life very fair.

Sportsmanship is also dead,
we must all say fairness instead.
It isn’t easy to be right,
in this grey world, no black or white.

The housewife now is also gone.
I think this is just one big con.
she now is called just a consumer,
if you believe all of the rumours.

We can’t now say our Christian name
in case we try and hand out blame
Our forefathers would not be pleased
to know that name has now been seized.

The thought police think they are kind,
but they are messing with my mind.
I like a man who opens doors,
they want to fill the world with bores.

I think it has gone far enough,
the world is hard and very tough.
Don’t label us as all the same,
we sometimes need a man to blame!

Jan Millward©