I’m Just an Ugly Flea!

This is a very amusing poem written by Tracey Curtis … it may make you itch! 

I’M JUST A UGLY FLEA

I’m just a little ugly flea, I found myself a home
Riding on the back of a cat, that likes to roam
I like it here it’s very nice, he takes me out at night
Although I get so nervous, when the cat just starts to bite.

He scratches with his claws, and his mouth is awful wide
But he hasn’t got me yet, as I know just where to hide
I don’t know what his problem is, I think he’s out of place
I’m just a little ugly flea, I don’t take up much space.

Wait a minute what’s he got?, He’s caught himself a rat
OMG the rats got fleas, get off my bloody cat
Leave my house you vermin, I don’t need no company
(Ugly flea)….”Oh Hello, who are you? You’re a cracking looking flea”.

(Meg.)….Thank you ugly flea, you’re so nice, my name is Meg
I’m here with my family, we’ve moved in, just down the leg
Come with us if you like, are you hungry? Have you fed?
Dad’s treating all the family, we’re dinning at the head.

(Ugly flea)……Thank you Meg I’ll do that, do you know the cats Siamese?
So it doesn’t matter where we go, the food is all Chinese
(Meg)…….Well, our last home was a rat neck, the food there tasted strange
So if your cat is what you say, Chinese will make a change

Our last cat was a Persian cat, the food there was so nice
But it didn’t matter where we ate, it all just tastes of rice
The poodle where we lived before, the main dish was snail and frog
With Sauerkraut & bratwurst taste, on our German shepherd ,dog

So I’m used to different foods, I don’t mind what I chew
So shall we go to dinner flea, as there’s bound to be a queue
(Ugly flea)…..I like you Meg, I really do, I think your very sweet
Maybe after dinner, I’ll take you down the feet

(Meg)…….OMG…What is that?  (Ugly flea)…..Quick hide it is the paw
Dig yourself in deeper Meg, or he’ll get you with his claw
(Meg)…….Help help! Ugly flea, I don’t know where to go
(Ugly flea)….Jump on to the tail, and keep your head down low

(Meg)….OMG he’s coming,  (Ugly flea)……Don’t worry Meg I’m here
I’ll jump up on his head up there, and bite him on the ear
Keep your wits about you Meg, sometimes he likes to gnaw
If he does, get of his tail, and jump down on to the floor

(Meg)…O ugly flea, you are so brave, to use yourself as bait
But you be careful Ugly flea, as his tongue could be your fate
(Ugly flea)….Don’t worry Meg, I’ve made it,  BITE BITE BITE...Take that you horrid cat
You just don’t scare this ugly flea, you big fat hairball brat

It’s ok Meg, he’s stopped now, he’s off to get his dinner
(Meg)……WAY YOU GO  Ugly flea, You’ve beat him ..You’re a WINNER
Thank you ugly flea, I think you saved my life
You’ve now become my hero, so in flea law, I’m your wife

(Ugly flea)…WHAT????? NO  NO  NO..This can’t be true
That was me just being kind, I’m just a little ugly flea, another you must find
(Meg)…..Oh one more thing you need to know, I hope you don’t go mad
But I have a million kids or so, and you’ve just become their dad!

WHAT ?????

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!