Don’t Call me on the Phone

Another witty poem from Tracey Curtis to bring a smile to your face!

DON’T CALL ME ON THE PHONE

There I was just sitting
In my garden on my own
Along comes this bumble bee
And lands upon my phone

I tried to shoo him off
But he wasn’t having that
He turned himself around
And on my phone is were he sat

He started to annoy me
As I couldn’t do a thing
Then all of a sudden
My phone it starts to ring

He started buzzing loudly
I thought it was the tone
I tried to shoo him of again
So I could grab my phone

But he wasn’t going anywhere
He sat there just vibrating
He seemed to be enjoying it
It really got frustrating

Then the phone stopped ringing
I had a message sent instead
I tried to shoo him off my phone
And he flew right for my head

He tried his best to get me
As I jumped up off my chair
I ducked my head and spun around
With my arms up in the air

I ran around the patio
As if I were insane
screaming and a shouting
As if I were in pain

He chased me up the garden path
And through the patch of veg
He chased me down the path again
And through the rosebush hedge

He chased me round the lawn three times
And round the garden swing
He chased me through the green bean canes
And though the netting string

He chased me through the fuchsia bush
And in and out the shed
He chased me through the washing line
And through the flower bed

I ran straight through the fish pond
And out the other side
I got inside the dog house
To see if I could hide

I could hear him buzzing on the roof
I felt like some old stray
But he couldn’t seem to find me
So he buzzed and flew away

I was cut, bruised and soaking wet
And my legs had gone all numb
I reversed back out the dog house
And got stung upon my bum

I reversed into the nettle weed
That was by the dog house door
It really hurt it stung like hell
As I got up off the floor

As I walked back to the patio
And  I sat down on my own
I looked across the table
To find the bee sat on my phone

Then the phone, start’s ringing
And I nearly started choking
As the bee looked straight at me, I said

“YOU MUST BE BLOODY JOKING!!”

©  Written by Tracey Curtis….13514