Over 50s dating tips from the professionals
Dating again later in life can be a daunting prospect, but one that has the potential to bring with it many benefits.
If you’re nervous about navigating the world of online dating over 50, you’re not alone – in the UK there are nearly a million over 50s dating online.
But recent surveys revealed that despite so many of us going online to date, many mature singles lack the confidence to begin dating again and nearly a third of those surveyed said they felt out of touch with dating etiquette.
With the help of online dating experts, British social skills and etiquette authority Debrett’s have released a handful of helpful tips to help you feel confident and put your best foot forward.
- Include a full length photo alongside a closer headshot. Choose photos that make you look friendly and approachable, and where you are relaxed and smiling. If you don’t have anything less than a year old, ask a friend to help.
- Include your pet in your profile images if you have one. 25% of over 50s said they think including an animal improves a profile picture. And if any potential matches aren’t animal lovers, they can quickly establish that in this case it’s probably not a match.
- Stay open-minded. It can be tempting to dismiss someone because you don’t like the look of their outfit or for other superficialities. In reality, these are rarely important, particularly if you can establish a spark between you. Before you eliminate someone from consideration, swap messages to see if you hit it off.
- Take initiative. While traditionally it’s expected that the man will make the first move, things are much more egalitarian now, and particularly online, there’s nothing unusual about making the first move if you’re a woman. Keep your first message light; mention what you liked about their profile or what you might have in common.
- Write as you speak. It’s not always easy to convey our personalities when we’re writing profiles or messaging matches. A good rule of thumb is to write as you would speak. Avoid using too many exclamations, kisses or emojis. Try and avoid any sarcasm or negativity – this often doesn’t come across well online and is best saved for when you’re speaking face to face.
- Seek out shared interests on your first date to make things more special. A walk through a local park or garden or a visit to a gallery or exhibition is a relaxed way to interact and gives you plenty of things to talk about if you’re feeling nervous.
- Go at your own pace. When it comes to physical intimacy, things are different than they were 30 years ago. Modern relationships tend to have a briefer courting period, and it’s perfectly acceptable to enjoy a hug, kiss or overnight stay if you’re both happy and comfortable to do so.
- Send a message. Survey results revealed more than half of over 50 daters wouldn’t send a message to their date the next day, even when they’re interested. While you don’t want to overdo contact and become overfamiliar or needy, it’s always worthwhile sending a message within 24 hours of meeting to keep the conversation going and reassure the other person that you’re interested.
Are you ready to try dating again? Silversurfers Dating is a great opportunity to meet other over 50s from the Silversurfers community.
Rachel - Silversurfers Assistant Editor
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