Dad’s New Camera

Dad’s New Camera

My dad has got a camera
He brought the other day
He thinks it’s very special
In every single way

He also brought a plasma screen
To fix upon the wall
He likes to keep up with the trends
It’s fifty inches tall

He’s got a special lead
That goes from one to t’other
We all go round to have a look
At pics of him and mother

In sharp and perfect detail
Upon the plasma TV
He shows us all the pics he took
He’s proud for us to see

There’s pictures of his garden
And lots of his old dog
Hills and rolling meadows
And a mossy covered log

It’s then disaster happens
I see a terrible thing
My mother Fifty inches wide
Sprawled across the screen

She’s wearing her best negligee
And a come hither smile
Oh how I wish that at this time
I could Run a mile

With camera on fast forward
He tries for something safe
How many pics of mother in her undies
Did he take?

Too many for my liking
I cannot drink my tea
I’ll never look at mum the same
Some things you can’t un-see

In glorious Technicolor
It’s etched upon my brain
I close my eyes, too late now
I’ll never be the same

Tracy Benham August 2017