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When Your Children Are Not Your Children Anymore.

By MackintoshAndMore Apr 16, 2017

I seem to have always referred to them collectively as “The Children”. When they were small they hung on my every word. I told them what to do and showed them how and when to do it, simple!?

With only fourteen months between them it was almost like having twins. Their personalities were quite different, a gregarious girl and a shy quiet boy, which I think is quite a common occurrence. I was determined their early lives would be about learning and laughing so from birth to pre-school we tried to make everyday a fun day.

I did have help, we lived abroad at this time so no family support was available. But Sesame Street and Barney The Purple Dinosaur were always on hand to entertain and teach, along with Bear In The Big Blue House and Blue’s Clues. I could not have managed without them, and I thank them for their contribution in the early years!
Back home in the U.K. the school years rubbed along with the usual highs and lows. Academic ability, peer groups and apparently most important, “fitting in”, not being left out. These are my main memories of these times, I guess they are challenging for everyone to some degree.
If your opinion is sought and advice given you hope it helps but ultimately, sometimes sadly, they have to learn to deal with things themselves, all I could do was ensure a stable, loving and supportive environment was waiting at home.
Now aged twenty and nineteen we have entered the university years, both are having the time of their lives and I am delighted for them. But it is only recently that I realised my children have been replaced by my daughter and my son.
Once I was the centre of their universe, now I’m just one of the planets, and I’m cool with that, maybe.
They don’t hang on my every word like they used to, and they don’t always take my advice, they don’t often ask now!

They’re pretty good about keeping in touch, mostly.

They both talk to me as if I’m a best friend (I am) not just Mum! I am included in their lives as much as I can reasonably expect as a parent, long may it continue.
They are branching out and gaining the confidence and independence to lead the life they want for themselves.

What more can you ask 😁

About the author

MackintoshAndMore
12 Up Votes
Husband, father and "Cottage Industry" helping my wife run our little business. My wife and I run a small craft based glass business from our home and I wondered if there were any kindred spirits out in Surferworld? Our business is called Mackintosh And More and we have been operating in one shape or form since 2004. Our attitude to work is quite focused as this is not a hobby it is how we make a living. We are always happy to share thoughts and experiences of our journey so far and always willing to learn. So why not tell us what business you run from home? Thanks for listening, Alan (and Marion).
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