The Decorating Disaster

This poem is written by Teresa Harrison-Best for all the folks that get that DIY bug over the Easter Holidays. It would be better to sit, relax and drink wine!

The Decorating Disaster

He had time off for Easter,
a little, well earned, rest.
“Perhaps a little D I Y ?”,
his wife made her request.

The bathroom needed sprucing,
some love and tender care.
A little splash of nice fresh paint
to enhance it here and there.

He set to work, a nice quick job,
his ladder now in place.
Covers spread across the floor,
concealing every space.

Now adorning pristine overalls,
he looked the perfect part.
With nice new brush dipped in the paint
the job in hand could start.

Whistling along to his favourite tune,
the chore was going well.
Painting like an expert now,
a shimmer of eggshell.

His wife fetched him some coffee
and a little slice of cake.
He gave a smile, then clambered down
to a well-deserved short break.

With refreshments done he climbed back up,
paintbrush clasped in hand.
He chuckled at the radio show
as he thought the jokes were grand.

His dog and cat were racing round
in their usual rambunctious way.
Sprinting up and down the stairs,
such a riotous mêlée.

He never saw it coming
as he laboured unaware.
With disaster now impending,
a collision fair and square!

The dog ploughed into the ladder,
which caught him on the hop.
It toppled like a deck of cards
and knocked him off the top.

Now an outbreak of pure chaos reigned
as he hurtled through the air.
The ladder crashed with such a bang,
now looking worse for wear.

As he tried to save himself from harm,
he brought the curtain down.
The curtain pole smashed through the pan,
there’s water all round.

The cat ran into the pot of paint
and the dog jumped in the tub.
Emulsion splattered everywhere,
beyond a gentle scrub!

As water flowed and haemorrhaged out,
it cascaded through the floor.
The bathroom was now like a lake
surging out the door.

Paint appeared just everywhere
as the dog and cat turned heel.
He stood there, dripping pure, white, gloss,
the whole event, surreal.

Now every carpet was swathed in paint
in paw prints of pure white.
His wife now fainting from the shock,
she went out like a light!

The plumber turned the water off
and they ripped up all the floors.
Their dog and cat were scoured and scrubbed
including eight glossed paws!

In the midst of all the turmoil now
the culprits slunk away.
Exhausted and in need of sleep,
tomorrow’s another day!

SIX MONTHS LATER

His wife asked him to paint the lounge,
in duck-egg blue and cream.
He looked at her in disbelief
before the great blaspheme!

“Perhaps we’ll get the professionals in!”

Written by Teresa Harrison-Best